Music: Angel by Jimi Hendrix

I'm happy with work so far, I think I've said it like 8 million times. I don't really have any responsibilities yet. I just do whatever I have to do when I'm asked to do it. The people are nice and all, only a couple of colleagues that I can really connect with though (I've never been soooo polite in my entire life before, maybe borderline snobbish/stuck up/unfriendly/pendiam I dunno what my officemates think of me hahaha, korang tgk aku sure heart attack punya lah). The others are.. not of the same wavelength so to speak. But they're ok to mingle with.

Two and a half month into this routine, now I really wanna move forward.. that is to say.. I wanna be someone more important, and subsequently, indispensable (long term). Right now, I'm practically nothing. My presence helps, my assistance is appreciated, some things can be done at a faster pace.. etc. But say I'm not around, yes there's less manpower but they still get the job done albeit having a little more share of the work, maybe it takes more time and so forth. I need to change this!! I have higher ambitions and aspirations and expectations of myself, I wanna be useful, can't be complacent with my current situation, or I'll go nowhere.. I want my inputs to be valuable, I wanna be looked up to, I wanna be knowledgable, I wanna change the world (ha ha)!! I need to up my ante, learn more and more (and I've already learnt so much, but there's like 8 million more things I don't freakin know anything about).

I'm eyeing a particular position in my dept but sadly there's no vacancy at the moment, or the near future for that matter. It is in my opinion that this position will help me move forward, both in technical expertise and social aspect. I've practically learnt about 80% of what there is to know and I think I can do the job, just need more practice to get that final 20% in place. If there'e ever an opening, I'll freakin pounce on it goddammit!

Hmm.. cakap pandai.. but I'm gonna do something about this, maybe not so soon. Damn aku baru masuk 2 bulan lebih, org lain masuk 3 bulan melepak baru dapat kerja, aku first week dah kena buat kerja, gotta be grateful. Makan gaji buta sikit2 ok la, tapi kalau lama2, I don't like it one bit. My morale will deteriorate, I may not feel competent in the long run, my brain will be dormant, my mind unstimulated. So, later on when I pickup more stuffs (tersurat dan tersirat--gotta work on this one lol) and get a clearer and larger picture of my career path, must work out my action plan.. But I need pencahayaan agung ne...